What is love?

In the dictionary, love (the verb) has so many definitions. It is to have profound tender, passionate affection; to need or require; to benefit greatly from. All of these apply when speaking about our relationships with others. But, is there a different kind of love when thinking of the marriage relationship?

Obviously, we are all familiar with what Scripture says love is: "Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails..." (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a).

That description, though, shows that love is not just a feeling. Love is also a choice. Love is there regardless of one's feelings at the moment. Love remains because of a commitment made to one another. It doesn't matter what the reasons were for taking vows. All that truly matters is that the vows were taken before God and must be kept. It doesn't matter if there are disagreements or struggles or confusion about whether or not love exists now. All things can be worked out between two followers of God.

That probably sounds trite and not nearly thought out enough; but I do truly believe it is the truth... not to mention, the right thing to do. God hates broken relationships. And, yes, I am one to talk about unresolved relationships (oh, the irony). As far as depends upon yourself, be at peace with one another. Make a relationship work. If both parties are amenable, reconciliation and love and peace will be restored because both will be working on their side of the relationship.

It sounds like I'm making it out to be so easy or simple. I'm not. This is complicated. There are a lot of things that need to be dealt with. Maybe the marriage took place too quickly and didn't give either of you time to recover from the past; but you belong to each other and are perfect together. It would be wrong to walk away because of struggles and arguments over family issues or confusion about whether or not you love each other. I know you do. Don't give up until you realize it. I do truly believe that God meant you two for each other. You understand and support one another like no one else ever could. You truly do complement each other and that is a gift from God. Don't let your families divide you... you are one in Christ and cannot be separated without severe damage to you both.

Jeremy has admonished me to not take everything to heart and overly burden myself with my friend's problems and concerns. I really am trying not to. The last thing I want to do is push my friend away because of the added stress of my concern. It must be heartwrenching to be dealing with these issues and I only want to be a support and a cause of good counsel.

I really care about you, friend. Don't hesitate to call me if you want to talk.